I hated breastfeeding my son. I was adamant that I would do 6 months and then he was getting formula. I had gone through split bleeding nipples, no sleep, the judgement of those around me, my own personal discomfort, having no life anymore...... and I hated it.
6 months arrived, and I suddenly realised that without noticing I had come to love breastfeeding. We had overcome all of our issues and were now in this wonderful time where breastfeeding was a lovely, close lull in the daily hum of activity. I was proud of our achievements, but more to the point I had come to value breastfeeding. It's not just all the normal benefits that everyone harps on about. Breastfeeding changed me. It made me the person I always wanted to be. That may sound over-zealous but its true. For me, breastfeeding had become this whole new centre in my life that was this huge source of inspiration and passion. It had taught me s much about myself and the value of the people who surround me. It made me want to help other people to have a good experience. At 6 months, I was determined to do 2 years.
My son's first birthday arrived. I was like the queen of breastfeeding. Everyone new about it because I was always wittering on about it. I was gonna breastfeed till my children were 30.
15 months came. My son had lost interest. He was bored at the breast. I was basically having to force it down his throat in this massive battle of wills every night where I eventually gave in and just put him to bed. It was a wrench, but I had to admit to myself that I no longer liked breastfeeding. I supported it vehemently - but we had come to the end of the road. While I would have fed forever if my son wanted it, he didn't want it either. I decided not to offer anymore. There was no ceremonial last feed, which I have mixed feelings about. I just stopped. He stopped. It was over. I found this very sad, but I am so thankful that we 'self weaned'. There were no tears (well, not from him), I gave him what he wanted for as long as he wanted.
So where does that leave me now? Nothing has changed. I will feed my daughter until she doesn't want it anymore. But I think that this time around I have nothing to prove. I would love to feed into toddlerhood (although I look at my son who is nearly 3 and find it a bit odd to imagine still breastfeeding him). I am glad that there was no battle with my son, I didn't upset him by taking his milk away. It just fizzled out of its own accord. I hope I get that with my daughter. But, I would like to experience feeding further into toddlerhood if that is what she wants.
Every stage has its beauty. Even when I look back at feeding my son in the early days, there was a lot that was good about it. I was just not in a position to recognise that then. But I do remember the quiet snuggles and the pride as we overcame each barrier. However, I was inordinately proud to be feeding past a year. To experience feeding a fidgety active little toddler who keeps pulling off the breast to look at his toys. Maybe I will get to feed past 2 this time? To have a baby who has a name for breastfeeding and can talk to me about it. I think I would like that.
So what is my point?
Feelings change. If somebody had said to me when my son was a week old that I would feed him for 15 months and then feel terribly sad when I gave it up, I would have raised my eyebrows in disbelief. If you now suggested to me that I stopped breastfeeding my daughter before she was ready I would be furious at the suggestion. As far as I see it, breastfeed your babies as long as you both want, whether that is a week or a year or a decade (OK, that may be going a little far).
The scavenger hunt is drawing to a close. You might want to check out the posts by
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Friday, 28 June 2013
Wednesday, 26 June 2013
Boob juice #kbbf #bf2013
My daughter was christened on Saturday. It was a really truly, lovely day. My old school friend who blogs at the 'wardrobe of words' was godmother, along with my sister-in-law. My husband's pal was godfather. After the service we went to the local village hall for my stressfully produced buffet (thank heavens for the female rellies that mucked in too).
Now, at my son's christening I had been very thankful that he had not demanded a feed. I remember being worried about having to feed in front of everybody, my nearest and dearest. Feeding in front of strangers is one thing, but in front of your closest friends and family I think it is a little harder. This time was a different matter. For one thing, my daughter was a little younger, which I think made me more comfortable in terms of other people's expectations of our feeding habits. But also, I also am far more relaxed anyway. So, when girly started to get fraxious, tired and hungry (she tried to latch on to my face) I just grabbed my shawl and snuggled her up.
At my table was my uncle. Lets call him 'Uncle Sy' (anyone related to me should now know who I'm talking about). Uncle Sy looked at me feeding and said
'So, you still got the juice then?' Now, me and Uncle Sy have a fairly friendly relationship. We don't see much of each other since he lives over 100 miles away, but we have always had a natural friendship. You know, he's just one of those people who is easy to get on with, a nice guy. It helps that we're not dissimilar in age, him being married to my Dad's youngest sister. Nonetheless, this question seemed a bit...forward. I thought I must have misheard him.
'Sorry?' I said.
'Have you still got the juice?'
'Um....' I felt a bit uncomfortable. I may be fairly blase about breastfeeding but this did seem a bit much 'yeah, I have.'
'Well done mate' said Uncle Sy.
'Er.....thanks Sy'
Now, thank goodness I did not say any more. I could have launched into a speech about how I had fed my son for 15 months, how it was easier this time around, how I am training as a mother supporter - all kinds of things. But luckily, through confusion, I was quiet for once.
'Yeah, one's gone broody now' said my husband was sitting next to Sy. OK, now I was confused. My brain started to catch up with my ears and I realised that what Uncle Sy had actually asked was 'So, you still got the chooks then', because I keep chickens. I felt a sudden sense of relief to discover that Uncle Sy wasn't a complete weirdo.
So here's my advice, people generally aren't that weird, so if you think they are make absolutely certain before you make a fool of yourself. And make sure you listen carefully to what people say to you :)
Keep on scavengin'
Have you checked out
www.bakingbetsy.co.uk
www.littlelillypad.co.uk/blog
www.ohsoamelia.com
www.peamusings.blogsopot.co.uk
www.diaryofafirstchild.com
Oh, and I really wish I had had a Snoob in my early days - go visit their website
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Now, at my son's christening I had been very thankful that he had not demanded a feed. I remember being worried about having to feed in front of everybody, my nearest and dearest. Feeding in front of strangers is one thing, but in front of your closest friends and family I think it is a little harder. This time was a different matter. For one thing, my daughter was a little younger, which I think made me more comfortable in terms of other people's expectations of our feeding habits. But also, I also am far more relaxed anyway. So, when girly started to get fraxious, tired and hungry (she tried to latch on to my face) I just grabbed my shawl and snuggled her up.
At my table was my uncle. Lets call him 'Uncle Sy' (anyone related to me should now know who I'm talking about). Uncle Sy looked at me feeding and said
'So, you still got the juice then?' Now, me and Uncle Sy have a fairly friendly relationship. We don't see much of each other since he lives over 100 miles away, but we have always had a natural friendship. You know, he's just one of those people who is easy to get on with, a nice guy. It helps that we're not dissimilar in age, him being married to my Dad's youngest sister. Nonetheless, this question seemed a bit...forward. I thought I must have misheard him.
'Sorry?' I said.
'Have you still got the juice?'
'Um....' I felt a bit uncomfortable. I may be fairly blase about breastfeeding but this did seem a bit much 'yeah, I have.'
'Well done mate' said Uncle Sy.
'Er.....thanks Sy'
Now, thank goodness I did not say any more. I could have launched into a speech about how I had fed my son for 15 months, how it was easier this time around, how I am training as a mother supporter - all kinds of things. But luckily, through confusion, I was quiet for once.
'Yeah, one's gone broody now' said my husband was sitting next to Sy. OK, now I was confused. My brain started to catch up with my ears and I realised that what Uncle Sy had actually asked was 'So, you still got the chooks then', because I keep chickens. I felt a sudden sense of relief to discover that Uncle Sy wasn't a complete weirdo.
So here's my advice, people generally aren't that weird, so if you think they are make absolutely certain before you make a fool of yourself. And make sure you listen carefully to what people say to you :)
Keep on scavengin'
Have you checked out
www.bakingbetsy.co.uk
www.littlelillypad.co.uk/blog
www.ohsoamelia.com
www.peamusings.blogsopot.co.uk
www.diaryofafirstchild.com
Oh, and I really wish I had had a Snoob in my early days - go visit their website
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Tuesday, 25 June 2013
A little help from my friends
In my early days of feeding in public, I used to find it hard. Fumbling under a cover of some kind trying to latch baby on was a nightmare. This was especially bad in the early days when I was still sore due to various latch issues that I had. Trying to not scream out in pain and frustration, along with being panicked about the reaction of strangers......it's not easy.
I might be lighthearted in this blog about feeding in public, but then I have been doing it for nearly 3 years. I have come a long, long, long way from that nervous new mum. So here's a tip -
When you have to face that hurdle of feeding outside for the first time, do it with a friend. If possible, do it with somebody who is already breastfeeding as some moral support. However if (like me) you don't know anyone that fits that bill, just take somebody you feel happy with. Somebody who can be a distraction for you and who you know will turn into a fearsome tiger if anybody dares to raise an eyebrow in your direction. A chaperon, a knight in shining armour. It will also make you less obvious, more transparent, to passers by.
I may have been in this situation for a while, but I have still enlisted friends to throw something over me when baby pulls away and exposes my breast completely. Or just to keep me company so I'm not so bored! Since having a baby I have needed my friends more than ever before and they ave become like gold to me.
Oh, and if you know a breastfeeding mum - offer to be that friend. The one who keeps her company, or does little helpful jobs for her. She needs you, she may just be too polite to ask.
Have you checked out these blogs yet?
www.themummyadventure.com
www.thesecretlifeofkate.co.uk
www.methemanandthebaby.co.uk
www.circusqueen.co.uk
www.petitmum.co.uk
Hop on over to the website of Eco Rainbow as well to look at their lovely stuff! I am slightly in love with their 'cat in the hat' breast pads. Use discount code 'BREAST' for 15% off
Good luck on the hunt xx
a Rafflecopter giveaway
I might be lighthearted in this blog about feeding in public, but then I have been doing it for nearly 3 years. I have come a long, long, long way from that nervous new mum. So here's a tip -
When you have to face that hurdle of feeding outside for the first time, do it with a friend. If possible, do it with somebody who is already breastfeeding as some moral support. However if (like me) you don't know anyone that fits that bill, just take somebody you feel happy with. Somebody who can be a distraction for you and who you know will turn into a fearsome tiger if anybody dares to raise an eyebrow in your direction. A chaperon, a knight in shining armour. It will also make you less obvious, more transparent, to passers by.
I may have been in this situation for a while, but I have still enlisted friends to throw something over me when baby pulls away and exposes my breast completely. Or just to keep me company so I'm not so bored! Since having a baby I have needed my friends more than ever before and they ave become like gold to me.
Oh, and if you know a breastfeeding mum - offer to be that friend. The one who keeps her company, or does little helpful jobs for her. She needs you, she may just be too polite to ask.
Have you checked out these blogs yet?
www.themummyadventure.com
www.thesecretlifeofkate.co.uk
www.methemanandthebaby.co.uk
www.circusqueen.co.uk
www.petitmum.co.uk
Hop on over to the website of Eco Rainbow as well to look at their lovely stuff! I am slightly in love with their 'cat in the hat' breast pads. Use discount code 'BREAST' for 15% off
Good luck on the hunt xx
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Sunday, 23 June 2013
'the benefits of breastfeeding', a ditty #kbbf #bf2013
The scavenger hunt is here!!! Here is my little poem to kick things off on my blog.
Breastmilk is yummy,
Breastmilk is good.
It's the very best way
To give babies food.
It keeps them all healthy
From their head to their toes,
By fighting their bugs,
And calming their woes.
If their skin gets itchy,
Or their bottom gets sore,
A squirt of some milk
And the red is no more.
If mummy needs fresh air,
No bag need she carry,
A baby in one arm,
In her pocket, a nappy.
Breastmilk costs nothing,
But a little more choc.
That means more pennies,
To spend on a frock.
OK, so I'm biased,
An addict, alright.
But when I look at my babies,
Something must have gone right.
Keep hunting! Why not try out
www.thebrickcastle.com
www.naturalmamas.co.uk
www.blog.cumming.me.uk
www.lifewithpinkprincesses.co.uk
www.mamageek.co.uk
Or check out the goodies at
www.breast-aid.com
Happy hunting and don't forget the rafflecopter!
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Breastmilk is yummy,
Breastmilk is good.
It's the very best way
To give babies food.
It keeps them all healthy
From their head to their toes,
By fighting their bugs,
And calming their woes.
If their skin gets itchy,
Or their bottom gets sore,
A squirt of some milk
And the red is no more.
If mummy needs fresh air,
No bag need she carry,
A baby in one arm,
In her pocket, a nappy.
Breastmilk costs nothing,
But a little more choc.
That means more pennies,
To spend on a frock.
OK, so I'm biased,
An addict, alright.
But when I look at my babies,
Something must have gone right.
Keep hunting! Why not try out
www.thebrickcastle.com
www.naturalmamas.co.uk
www.blog.cumming.me.uk
www.lifewithpinkprincesses.co.uk
www.mamageek.co.uk
Or check out the goodies at
www.breast-aid.com
Happy hunting and don't forget the rafflecopter!
a Rafflecopter giveaway
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